We have the opportunity on the daily to make a positive impact on the world around us.
Whether one goes through their day searching for good deeds to be done,
or simply takes advantage of random opportunities to spread love,
every action (or inaction) has a resounding impact.
The question is: Is your impact today going to be positive, negative, or indifferent?
I have been told that one person can't make a difference.
I affectionately call these people "dummies"...
Those who actively try to hold the rest of us down,
those who would rather watch you drown than help you soar, those who can't grasp the power of positivity to create change.
Whether it's a great recipe found, or an uplifting story to share, you can be sure to find it here.
Let's start a Positivity Revolution, and drown out the dumb!

Monday, June 22, 2015

What About, "For Better or For Better"?

When I moved into my own place, I bought a TV just so I could listen to Pandora like Cathie. I loved walking into her apartment and hearing "Nasty Girl's Radio" blasting (obvi the best station). I thought I would use my TV for more than just music, but it's rare unless golf is on a local station and I want to take a nap.

So I'm listening to Beyoncé radio today, which is a fantastic mix of artists like Destiny's Child, Drake, Nicki Minaj, and Sam Smith. This results in a random playlist throughout the day...sometimes it's love songs...most the time, it's raunchy rap. As any teenage girl or sappy adult can attest, love songs mean guys promising they'll love you forever, and women asking if they'll love them for better or worse...blahblahblah. One such lyric that caught my ear this afternoon was by Sam Smith, in "I'm Not The Only One". He croons, "You and me, we made a vow, For better or for worse, I can't believe you let me down..."

This made me question: Why does marriage have to mean "For better or for worse?" This implies things will inexplicably get worse. Instead of the vow meaning what it intended, ensuring that a couple understands it won't be all rainbows and unicorns every day, it more often provides a cop-out. It essentially allows one or both partners to act however they want and use this as a Get Out of Jail Free card. You fall in love with someone when they are at their best; when your day revolves around the next time you get to see them; when you can't wait to take them somewhere new or tell them a funny story. Sadly, new, shiny things (and people) fade, but by then you've been together that "right amount of time" and what else can you do besides get married? So you make this impossible promise that you really have no idea the extent or intensity of, in the blind hope that you will defy the other half of married couples who don't make it.

All this to say, I love the idea of marriage; it's beautiful: Find someone who loves you just as you are; Forever. But in order for marriage to become more realistic, the phrase in question should be removed. It's BS to expect me to stay in love with you if you act like a jackass. Why wouldn't we give our best selves to our spouses on the daily? How are you supposed to stay in love with someone who doesn't act as they did when you first fell in love? Or worse, someone who changes completely once they "have" you?

I would hope that if I ever pull the trigger, "For better or for worse" would mean that every day we try to be good to each other. And when shit hits the fan, we will be the other person's support so we can make it through, united. Complacency is what kills marriage, not the concept of marriage itself.

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