Celebrating Life and Death

“ On October 31, All Hallows Eve, the children make a children's altar to invite the angelitos (spirits of dead children) to come back for a visit. November 1 is All Saints Day, and the adult spirits will come to visit. November 2 is All Souls Day, when families go to the cemetery to decorate the graves and tombs of their relatives. The three-day fiesta filled with marigolds, the flowers of the dead; muertos (the bread of the dead); sugar skulls; cardboard skeletons; tissue paper decorations; fruit and nuts; incense, and other traditional foods and decorations. ”
—Frances Ann Day, Latina and Latino Voices in Literature(Latina and Latino Voices in Literature, Greenwood Publishing Group, page 72)



Today is "All Souls Day", when families can go to the cemetery and adorn the graves of their relatives with beautiful flowers. Living across the country from my family and friends makes it impossible to physically visit the final resting places of those loved and lost over the years; and truthfully, All Souls Day is not something I would have been interested in participating in when I lived in Colorado. I was much more inclined to pretend that death didn't, or wouldn't, happen.

Of course, memories float in every once in a while about friends who have died too young, or family members I wish I could give one more hug to; but the last few days I've been deliberately thinking about those I've lost. It always hurts, but why not choose to celebrate the time we had together instead of pushing those memories away? All Souls Day gives us the opportunity to celebrate the life that was, and I've decided to embrace this tradition.

Death is not something I deal with well. It is so much happier to pretend life will go on forever, than to realize that death comes to us all. I've always wanted to change my thought process surrounding the inevitable. I know the reason I get so sad about death is because I'm terrified for this wonderful life to end; it's pure selfishness. I don't know how I will survive when I lose my sister, or Matt, or my mom, or my best friend (to be honest, I hope I die first). It makes my heart hurt just to think about a world without those I love the most in it, and even more to know almost for certain that I will experience that pain.

BUT...The Day of the Dead and the celebrations that follow provide me the opportunity to face death somewhat fearlessly...I choose to celebrate life AND death.